tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2260339975332736535.post3866735509099167229..comments2023-05-30T05:00:12.128-07:00Comments on LezBmommies: Feeling like an a-hole: Thicker than water part IIAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02174277681696736793noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2260339975332736535.post-89319307344932156822015-02-19T18:35:12.186-08:002015-02-19T18:35:12.186-08:00Thank you for this. I still haven't mustered u...Thank you for this. I still haven't mustered up the courage to talk to him. But I know I need to. I don't want to go the rest of my life with what ifs hanging over me. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02174277681696736793noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2260339975332736535.post-49014585365319419032015-02-19T13:46:19.503-08:002015-02-19T13:46:19.503-08:00Family is one of those things, where you know some...Family is one of those things, where you know sometimes that if they weren't family, you would cut the strings and move on and never look back. But they ARE family, and things aren't that easy. As someone who suffered from a mental illness for a long time and also someone who lacks empathy for shit like that, if he wanted to get better, he would. He would accept whatever help he is offered because he doesn't want to be in the position that he is in. I think that it may be worth it to at least try and have one more heart to heart with him. You could go on not talking to him for the rest of your life, but will you be satisfied with knowing that you didn't at least try to understand him and have him understand you? I would say everything that I had to say and go in without a single expectation of the outcome. Sometimes, just saying our piece is all we need to feel better and understand that things are the way they are but not becaue we didn't try. This is a tough situation, but I hope that it all works out. And i hear you on that "creating our own family tree" thing. You surround yourself and your beautiful family with people that value, care and appreciate them. That;'s the best way, and they will be none the wiser if they didn't know their uncles, aunts, cousins, what have you. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2260339975332736535.post-50413296606770770172015-01-25T12:11:38.781-08:002015-01-25T12:11:38.781-08:00Man! This is really good advice-I am never that el...Man! This is really good advice-I am never that eloquent with words lol. We prob won't see each other in person-he lives about 12 hours away so I think it's hard for me to convey my feelings on the phone. I think I'm just scared too. I don't want to make it worse but if I don't say anything how can it get better? Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02174277681696736793noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2260339975332736535.post-22992174766900102015-01-25T01:04:56.017-08:002015-01-25T01:04:56.017-08:00hahahahaha! avon red lipstick! i love it! you know...hahahahaha! avon red lipstick! i love it! you know, my dad was the same way about my nana (his mom) finding out abt me being gay. to make a long story short she took it surprisingly well and accepted my wife as her own! i'm sorry about your brother. PTSD is a horrible disease, but... its not an excuse to be an a$sh*le either! is there a way for you to talk to your brother alone? sit down with him, have a hear to heart, empathize with him (no matter how hard it is for you!) and tell him how you feel. don't tell him what he did wrong, just focus on telling him how his action feel. maybe start off with something like "i'm really happy we've reconnected. i appreciate that you waited around to see me. i'm sorry if my reaction wasn't what you expected. i'm still very hurt by the things you said to me. your words are embedded in my head. i want nothing more than to leave this behind us... but i'm so angry." Maybe this isn't something you would say, but you get the idea. i read a lot of communication books and they recommend expressing how you feel without putting blame on the other person. focus on the issue and how to move passed it. it works for me with my wife, and with my members as well! i hope you are able to forgive him one day, but more importantly i really hope he apologizes for being such a douche. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05199363078517846458noreply@blogger.com